Happy Mother's Day from The Brat Child

        Okay, I’ve decided to honor my mother this mother’s day with some top quality poetry from her daughter the gifted writer. *snort* Hey, no laughing this is serious business!

Let’s start with me. Daughter: the things I was as bratty child and have grown out of as an adult. (I think. I hope!)

D: dishonest
            A: argumentative

U: ungrateful
            G: galling

H: hateful

T: toxic

E: exasperating

R: rude

Now onto what Mother means to me… Mother’s Love And Caring

M: is for the mud I tracked across the floor a hundred times.
O: is for the orange juice you caught me drinking from the jug.
T: is for the toilet paper I never refilled.
H: is for the heated arguments that should have gotten me a slap upside the head.
E: is for my over-blown ego and your ability to ignore it.
R’: is for the rude replies and ignorant responses.
S: is for the shirking of chores and lazy-ass behavior.

L: is for the lies I told that you let slip by.

O: is for the obnoxious eye-rolling when asked to do something.
V: is for the vet bills for all my pets.
E: is for every time I was nasty to my sisters and you didn’t kick my ass.

A: is for Andrea, the sister you gave me who got blamed for my misbehaviour.
N: is for the nights I kept you up wondering where the hell I was and with who.
D: is for the dollars I wasted, extorted and ‘borrowed’ from you.

C: is for the chair I put through the china cabinet window: you don’t want to know how.
A: is for the annoying, stupid things that kept you awake at night.
R: is for my reign of terror over house, home and family.
I: is for all the ice cream I finished and blamed my siblings for.
N: is for the noisy, head splitting, rock music. Bet you regret giving me that stereo!
G: is for going to bat for me all the times I did something rude or idiotic in public.

            Good gravy, how could you even stand me? Thank heavens for a mother’s love that keeps her from killing her offspring!
            This one is for you Mom. I owe you and Dad for everything I am, everything I have achieved and accomplished. The stupid, irritating and annoying parts of me are all my own doing. You and dad are fabulous parents and I can’t thank you enough for all you have done for me. Nor can I apologize enough for the stress, trials and tribulations. Even if they were all Andrea and Jean’s fault. J Oh wait; they might have been Kevin’s fault too.  

Who me? Clearly I am the picture of innocence.

            I love you Mom, more than words can ever express.

Hugs
Cath